30/12/2012

MY LAST RESORT

Don't you see, these physical bruises and cuts 
  are nothing?
The bruises and cuts to my soul are what
  hurts me.
You just do not care.
You cannot see beyond yourself.
Always drunk, always high.
You are slowly killing me.
I feel like nothing.
Is not that what you always say?
I am listening, I can hear you, I believe you.
I cannot see anything but your words of 
  sharpened steel.
Shot straight through my heart, shattering it.
You always laugh when you beat me.
I don't understand.
I am just a child.
I cannot fight back.
I wish that I could, I would see you dead.
Right now I am feeling dead on the inside.
I want to end all the hurt and pain from all
  the harms I am afflicted with.
I only see one way out.
Killing this beaten and broken body.
You wouldn't be able to hurt me any more.
Oh, the sweet release of everything.
I would look down on you and wish all evil 
  upon you.
But it should not have to be this way.
I deserve so much more.
You don't!
You should die!
I wish you would just drop stone cold dead.
Either way I have to escape this living hell.
I will take my last resort.
I am leaving this so-called life, 
  it's all thanks to you.
I wish God would strike you down.
But I don't see God here.
He has forgotten about me, leaving me forsaken.
I don't want to go to heaven, I don't want to go 
  to hell.
Since I am already nothing, 
  then nothing I shall remain in death.
I just want it to stop.
This is my cry.
I just want to be free of all this.
I am of no consequence.
I give up, I give in.
I am broken here.
I want out.
To end this nothing life, that is dead anyway.
My last resort to take.

SCOTT DAVID BUCKLEY-(30/12/2012)

1 comment:

  1. Child abuse is far harmful than the physical harms, it's the tears to the soul that hurt the most. When always told that one is nothing, then that is how the child will come to believe. It can and/or will lead to hopelessness. And the wish for an escape any way that will be. A last resort is death, it happens, and it should never be that way. God please, protect those unable to defend themselves.

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